Folks, I feel so embarrassed. I’ve been sitting on top of a knowledge gold mine for several years now with the chance to help the scientific minds of our country study the other side. I have unlimited access to a MAGA millionaire family.
I’ve been observing them and picking them apart this entire time without realizing I was doing so. I was only dissecting them for personal and comedic purposes, but I guess I could be contributing to the greater good of mankind by sharing my findings. The professionals can’t figure it out or they’d been eradicated by now like an invasive species.
I won’t go into detail by naming names or specifics to their identity for the sake of legal business in which I couldn’t afford to taunt. I will, however, attempt to describe my findings like that of the legendary Steve Irwin jamming his finger in a crocodile’s bum. Perhaps we can locate their thermal exhaust port. Gods save the queens and such.
Not gonna lie. I think the world glitched when Steve Irwin died. RIP.
Mutual of Omaha’s MAGA Safari.
“Today, we find the juvenile prince of the MAGA species returning home to coddle his offspring prior to notice of the powers-that-be. The matriarch has fulfilled his financial obligations so a mere twenty-four hours should suffice for the next month or two. Of course, as is par for the course for the MAGA-ots, they feel no need to inform the recipients of their follies which hour they wish to rendezvous. Now, this presents their victim’s ability to formulate joy in their own lives via scheduled activities with a conundrum. Do you ask the junior prince to seek instruction on how to simply tell time, or forfeit your joy for another day sans their honorable presence?”
To be continued…
Also, don’t forget your book!
Today’s offering?
A tale of revenge…
A Curse Beyond Comprehension. A Power Beyond Belief. A Girl Far From Home. Katie Liberman is your typical eighteen-year-old college student…or at least that’s what her family thinks. Picking up five years after the events of A Taste of Home, Katie has dropped out of school and embarked upon a dangerous quest to find Kurt Jimmerson, the New York City attorney responsible for her family’s werewolf curse. Unknown to her, the attorney’s grip on the ‘City That Never Sleeps’ is tighter than imagined and she’ll need any and all help available to be victorious. But… where do you find friends when you’re Far From Home?
Also, there’s a few other things not listed here that are floating around out there. Best of luck with the hunt.
Current Projects
Rev. Dare Cloud
Reverend · adjective. worthy of adoration or reverence. synonyms: sublime · sacred.
is a Dallas author, musician, and gonzo journalist. Some of his works include the controversial splatter-western Starving Zoe (written as C. Derick Miller), the Taste of Home trilogy, and the ongoing Jim Walker series. He is also the co-host of the American Justice Podcast and Senior Writer/Junior Producer for AtuA Productions LLC. His literary crushes are (of course) Hunter S. Thompson, J.D. Salinger, and Kevin Smith. Preach truths, toke jokes, and shoplift Amazon.
“You’ve got to press it on you You’ve just been thinking That’s what you do, baby Hold it down, Dare!” – Gorillaz
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