The Gonzo Wolf

Let me bring you up to speed.

Over the last month, I’ve noticed that Dallas PD ISD (an agency who you’d think would want to be the most visible, for the sake of our children’s lives in our current world) have a fleet of ghost cars. From what I’ve witnessed, I can’t help but come to the conclusion they’re secretly pulling ICE duty in a city who fondles The Great Orange Testicle. Our Governor passed the law forcing all state and county officers to pull immigration duty when needed. Needs are a point of view, and they haven’t bothered to take me to lunch yet to explain their purpose. The offer has been on the table for weeks.

This morning, the ghost car had someone pulled over right in front of a school, which is their jurisdiction, but obviously for all the wrong reasons. I’ve watched dozens of these stops, and they never write tickets. I’ve only witnessed them pulling over Hispanic drivers, who they check, and send upon their merry way. They’re not creating revenue via stops and arrests in school zones.

Do you know how much money a police agency can make in a school zone? All fines grow dramatically larger if you’re unlucky enough to get popped in one. Nope; just checking ID’s in the ghost cars, and causing traffic issues during the busiest time of the day.

It’s class-bullying, or even organized terrorism from my POV, and I know what terrorism looks like. I’ve had tons of military and police anti-terrorism training, which basically means they train you how to be a terrorist. That badge gets pretty heavy on the witness stand, homie.

So, this morning, I took a chance. I wanted to interview one of these officers to see why they were so vigilantly disturbing the peace in my neck of the woods. Unfortunately, none of them would pull me over.

First, I made direct eye-contact with a white officer as he finished his unlawful ID check and I screamed, “Quit bullying good people, you fascist cuck!”

He was frightened. I could see it clearly in his eyes, or I guess I was just too white. He’s the only one who knows for sure, and he wasn’t willing to strike up an impromptu conversation.

That didn’t work, so I found another. I drove the block and screamed Rob Zombie lyrics at them, with my truck windows rolled down and the music at max volume. Nope, still too white.

I wonder what I won’t get pulled over for next?

I’ve got all day to think about it.

Dallas ISD PD: those Hunky’s hamburgers are really good. If you can afford ghost cars, you can afford my lunch. Let’s have an official interview. Tell the people what you’re really doing, unless it’s illegal and shady; then, tell me. I’ll spin it to where it makes you look like a gutless victim or circumstance.

Preach truth, toke jokes, and shoplift Amazon. We have severe thunderstorms occurring in Dallas over the next week. Let’s see if these road-pirates think their unlawful traffic stops are worth getting drenched over.

Good times.